Prepare For Mediation

How Can I Prepare For Mediation?

Divorce is a challenge at best!  This is because it’s not uncommon to be anxious or apprehensive about sitting down with your spouse and speaking about difficult, unresolved issues with a Mediator. The mediator is in control of the negotiations, to insure that you agreements on issues are fair to both spouses.

The nature of the mediation is very informal. Thus, you are in a neutral setting which should be much less stressful than a contested divorce!

Get plenty of rest, and eat a meal before you come to the mediation conference. The reason is because it’s important to be able to concentrate, sometimes for several hours.

Be Prepared To Spend Some Time

A Divorce Mediation usually takes up issues involving finances. This includes the equitable distribution of assets, allocation of debt, support and alimony. If you are participating in Mediation without legal counsel and before the commencement of a court action for divorce, (this is often called “pre-suit”), each of the parties should prepare and bring with them to the Mediation conference a list of all assets and liabilities, whether titled in your individual name or jointly with any other person, as well as income information.

Primary focus will be given to developing a new plan of parenting, if the mediating couple has minor children. The reason why is because you need a plan that will serve the best interests of your children and provide a new framework for your family after the divorce. Reflect, in advance of the mediation session, on what your goals are for your children and family.

If you need a break during the mediation session to use the restroom, get a snack, a smoke or just to regroup to clear your head, make that known to the mediator (or your attorney if present) and take the time that you need to refocus.

Think Ahead

Think ahead about what you want to accomplish in the mediation; make a list of your goals ahead of time and bring it with you to review.

Maintain a calm demeanor, speak respectfully to your spouse (no fighting allowed) and listen as best you can. The goal is to have an open and fruitful discussion to achieve a fair resolution and amicable divorce.

 

Judith Goldberg, Attorney & Mediator.   Connect With Judith